Emotional Support

No, This Is America

One of my biggest issues with the Democratic party is their negativity. They’re can’t stop talking about the evils of the past long enough to realize their President is senile. And unfortunately, it’s a negativity that has infected the Republicans party as well. how many times in the Republican debate did we hear things like “We’re a nation in decline.” It’s a sentiment that has infected both parties and while by some measures it may technically be true, it is far from the truth.

Yes, life expectancy fell in 2020 and 2021; yes, we have more drug addiction and gun violence; yes, we live shorter lives than our peer countries; yes, our debt is out of control. These things are all true, and yet The United States of America is still the envy of the world and the greatest country on earth. And I’m here to help provide some perspective¹.

Wealth

America is by far the richest country on earth and in terms of GDP per capita, we are in the top 10 and in terms of median income, the top 4. “But,” you say, “we spend more on healthcare than anyone else.” To which I would reply: actually, when you look at median income minus out-of-pocket expenditure per capita we still are in the top 4 in terms of adjusted median income². Did you know that most Brits have their washing machine in their kitchen? We’re so freaking rich we don’t even realize it.

Freedom

Many countries are free, but America is by far the most free. Lauren and I visited the UK about a year ago and I distinctly remember on our bus tours of London they made a point to show you this area in the park where you have freedom of speech. I was struck by that, because where I come from you have freedom of speech everywhere. And even in that area of the park, there were limits to your freedom of speech. You may think I’m exaggerating, but the UK passed a series of anti-hate speech laws last year and people were literally arrested for things they posted online. Imagine that. You say something distasteful online, no intent of actually acting on it or anything and suddenly the police are at your door. Not in America.

In the EU, you don’t even have the freedom to buy a phone that doesn’t have a USB-C port. If next year they invented a better port than USB-C that was 1000% faster at charging and data transfer, it would be illegal. And do you remember the internet before the EU destroyed it? I do. There was a time when every website you visited didn’t ask you if cookies were okay. You could just go to a website and not have a full screen prompt interrupt your browsing. Yes, the EU has even made your life worse in America.

Choice

The iconic picture below of Boris Yeltsin visiting an American supermarket. The soviet leader had never seen anything like it. Not only is it stocked, there are an unbelievable amount of choices at your fingertips. And within 10 minutes of my house there are at least 3 of these. If you’ve ever lived in another country, you know this is an American phenomenon. Even rich, developed countries just do not have the same freedom of choice³ that we do.

And this is, in part, why we have lower life expectancy than other countries in our peer group. It is easier to be fat and unhealthy in the US than anywhere else on earth. And while obesity and the associated complications and chronic diseases are tragically killing too many Americans, it’s because we can choose to be fat in America! We can choose to own a car and never walk or take the bus, we can choose to eat crap every day, we can choose to buy a big screen tv because we are rich and then have junk food delivered to our door because we are rich and have different junk food every night because of all the choice we have. There’s something beautiful about this tragedy we’ve created for ourselves.

Trade-offs

I’ll end with this. When thinking about American issues, it seems to me that most people are not comparing America with actual countries. Does America have its issues, yes. But is there anywhere else on earth that even compares with this place? I mean not really. We are the center of tech, finance, pharmaceutical innovation, higher education, culture, entertainment, space exploration, and so much more. Yes, having all of these choices and freedoms has come with tradeoffs, some of them bad and some of them probably not worth it. But, before your next tirade into the evils of American capitalism, can you first just do a reality check⁴?

I’m not saying there aren’t thing we need to fix, but just stop with the fear mongering, guilt tripping, and depression. We are a successful, wonderful nation working to build a more perfect union. That’s hard work and we don’t always get it right, but that doesn’t mean we’re a nation in decline or that the whole system of capitalism or the American experiment is a failure.

Try-hards

Two men have my heart right now. And it’s for the same reason. One, no surprise to anyone, is Tom Cruise. The second is Timothee Chalamet. Timmy gave a speech last or early this year about how he wants to be one of the greats. And I fell in love. And now, Timmy has decided to stop hiding his aura under a bushel and I’m falling harder. Clearly he has felt some sort of burden lifted from off of his shoulders because he’s attending Knicks games dressed like Guy Fieri and getting so fired up he’s becoming the star of the show.

Same with Tom. These are two passionate men, giving their all to their craft and then with that same energy just being completely uninhibited in public life. Now the public like Timmy more than Tom, but public opinion is fickle, they could just as easily turn on my boy and think he’s a goon. Not me. You boys continue to unleash on the world and I’ll continue to have your back.

Coalition of Dads

Speaking of having backs, I wish everyone could experience being a dad in the world. Other dads just got you. It’s a brotherhood of emotional support for strangers and I think we should all seek to emulate it. I had a dad, just this week at the airport, just let me know he saw me and told me, “it gets better, I promise.” I’m not even sure what that means, because it really wasn’t that bad, but I guess when a dad sees another dad kicking his luggage to scoot it along because both of his hands are full, you gotta go in with the support. So, I exhort you to support those in your cohort like random dads have been supporting me, because honestly, I feel like I now know what it feels like to get a new bra. Emotionally, of course.

1. Unless I specifically state otherwise, all stats and data referenced today are from Our World in Data.

2. Obviously that’s median minus mean, but I’m not a researcher, it’s the best I could find.

3. If that phrase triggered you about abortion, I dare you to look at European countries abortion laws. Most are up to 14 weeks or less which would give most US liberal a stroke. By my count it’s about 18 states in the US don’t go up to 14 weeks. I could be wrong, but it’s under 20. Which means much more than half of the women in United states can get an abortion past the allowable time in Europe. But that’s not what this is about because I truly just do not see abortion access as an indicator of how developed a country is.

4. And I didn’t even go into racism. If you think America is racist, you really haven’t spent much time anywhere else. We are easily the most developed, diverse, successful democracy on earth. And that’s hard, but we need to stop focusing on what divides us or else we’re going to destroy that.